My Heart on a Tree

I'm a rambler, so if you don't like my wordy posts, please just enjoy this image of my sweet Sophia. Her smile brightens my day. Every day.

My whole life I've either been too connected or too disconnected from my heart. Something inside me either feels too much, or nothing at all. I've been good at building walls around my heart when I've "needed" to, and I've accused myself of falling too deeply in love when I shouldn't. But as I've grown older and observed more about myself throughout my life, and the way I react to certain things, I have realized some truths, the most important being:

I am who I am.

I am:
unique
beautiful
smart
quirky
sentimental
happy

And I can't change who I am and feel like I'm being true to myself, or to those who have invested their heart and soul into my life. Because isn't that what happens? We invest in those we love. Time, heart, money, and so on.

And I can't change the way I see the world, or the way I feel it. And what I've come to realize is that I don't need to. My vision, my interpretation of what life means and looks like, is wonderful to me. It brings me comfort and peace, and most of all joy.

As a photographer I have come to think that I need to photograph in a certain way, and while still infusing some of my style and vision, I've let that overrun me and the way that I've been functioning for the past several years. But it must stop! Why?

Because my heart is on a tree.

What does that mean? It means I am hanging myself out there for the world to see. I am putting my heart on a branch and waiting for it to ripen, and I can't do that if I've buried it. I can only do that if I feed it.

I got into this business for many reasons, but the biggest was that I've always appreciated the emotion and connection in particular photos, in songs, in books. I've always felt this innate desire to create, yet a complete inability to do so. Until I found that I had a knack for photography, and for connecting with people, and helping people to feel beautiful and connected. This industry can be completely competitive, and it's easy to feel like you are not enough when other photographers seem to have it all under control, or seem to be more creative, etc. It's hard in the state I work in sometimes because it's an over-saturated market. It's hard justifying spending all of my time away from my family when I'm not really making money (just re-investing it all back into my business and learning).

But I do have something unique to offer.

So with that, I am hanging my heart on my tree, and letting you know that the way I approach my work will be as honest as I can muster. I want to show you love and connection in the way that I see it, because I think some of you will like what I see.

Stay tuned for some casting calls later this week.

Much love to all my friends and readers. You inspire me every day to work harder, and to be better.